If so, consider sharing before a relationship becomes serious. Before sharing, consider how you would feel most comfortable doing it. Some people simply talk about the cancer experience. Others show scars or other body changes associated with cancer. Some express their fears and concerns through humor. Learn more about talking with a partner. As a relationship deepens, you may wonder how your experience with cancer could affect your sexual health and intimacy with your partner.
Cancer and cancer treatment can cause side effects related to sexual heath. These may be physical or emotional. Talk with your health care team about potential sexual side effects. Tell them about specific ones you experience. They can give you options for managing or lessening these side effects. Learn more about how men and women can cope with changes to their sexual health during and after treatment. Communication is important for healthy sexual feelings in any relationship.
In particular, sharing cancer-related concerns can help relieve worries. It can also help boost emotional intimacy and trust. There is no perfect time to talk about sex. But it is best to discuss it before becoming sexually intimate. Practice saying sexual terms aloud, in advance.
Most sex therapists recommend using medical terms. It is best to avoid slang or euphemisms. Keep in mind that sexual intimacy involves more than intercourse. Experiment with other ways of giving and receiving sexual pleasure. Talking with a counselor or sex therapist. These professionals help address problems with communication and intimacy. Joining a support group. These forums provide a safe place to share and learn from others with similar situations.
Online Communities for Support. Dating and Intimacy Approved by the Cancer. Tips for pursuing new relationships Concerns about dating and sexual intimacy after cancer treatment are common. Consider these strategies when developing new relationships: Practice positive self-talk.
For example, make a list of your positive qualities. Being single can mean someone is unmarried, does not have a domestic partner, or is not currently in a romantic relationship. It has nothing to do with their sexual orientation or gender identity, but rather their relationship status. Single people who have cancer often have the same physical, psychological, spiritual, and financial concerns as people with cancer who are married, have a partner, or are in a relationship.
But these issues can be more concerning in people who are single, and getting through treatment can be harder in some ways. Single people with cancer have several needs that others may not, because:. Relationship experts suggest that cancer survivors should not have more problems finding a date than people who are not cancer survivors.
However, studies show that survivors who had cancer in their childhood or teenage years might feel anxious about dating and being in social situations if they had limited social activities during their illness and treatment. For survivors who had or have cancer as an adult, a personal or family experience with cancer can affect a possible partner's reaction to hearing about the survivor's cancer.
For example, a widow or a divorced person whose former partner had a history of cancer may have a different reaction than someone who has not had the same experience. Deciding about when to start dating after a cancer diagnosis is a personal choice.
Single people with cancer need to make their own decision about this. Some people might think dating will help them feel "normal" and going out helps them keep their mind off issues related to their cancer. Studies show some find it challenging to start a new relationship or trying to date during treatment. If you're recovering from surgery, getting regular treatments, or treatments in cycles, or dealing with side effects of medications, being "yourself" on a date can be hard.
Your appearance might have changed, or your energy level might be lower. In addition to having home and family responsibilities, you also might have extra appointments that use up some of your personal time. For these reasons, many people with cancer wait until treatment has ended or until they've had a chance to recover before they join the dating scene again. If you're thinking about dating for the first time since being diagnosed with cancer, it's important to think about if and when you want to mention you're a cancer survivor.
Some people might want to give this information up front, and even list it in their profile if they're using a dating site or app. Others might prefer to have a face-to-face talk about it when they meet someone. And some people might want to wait until they've been dating someone for a while or until a relationship becomes serious. Being comfortable talking about your cancer might not be possible, but it's best to tell someone about having cancer before make a strong commitment.
Then ask them a question that leaves room for many answers. This gives them a chance to take in the new information and respond. It also helps you see how they take the news. How do you think that might affect our relationship? It also scares me to think about it, but I need you to know about it. What are your thoughts or feelings about it? You may want to practice how you might tell a dating partner about your cancer history.
The same holds true for people rebounding from cancer. Cancer Survivor Dating offers online help for cancer patients who are now cancer-free and looking to rejuvenate their dating life. The site explains how diving back into the dating pool after treatment can give the spark needed to kick start a post-cancer life. Even if that connection goes no further than a chat over coffee or sharing stories over dinner, having another person to lean on in the journey back from cancer is valuable.
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Contact us today to speak with a professional counselor who is standing by to assist you. More Posts. Follow Me:. Your email address will not be published. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. Facebook Twitter Google. Exploring these issues on the discussion boards is a wonderful way to see how others have worked their way back into the "dating scene" and found happy, fulfilling relationships.
There may not be a magic formula, but many have found partners that appreciate the experiences of cancer survivors while bringing to the relationship their own unique set of challenges they have overcome. A part of survivorship includes pursuing your goals for life. So your request is not trivial. Please feel free to discuss this topic, it is very much encouraged. Also, volunteering and doing for others is beneficial in physical, emotional, and social ways.
The ACS can always use volunteers, so it's a win-win situation. Here's one source, a link to the "Get Involved" site for the American Cancer Society They're the folks who maintain this site There are opportunities for volunteering and fund-raising. They may have other ideas, too And there's a phone number to call to get to chat with a real person.
Now, I am feeling lonely, sad and very upset, the way he plays me was horrible. Now, I decided to loook for somebody in my conditions that wants to date. I have stomach cancer and 54 years old, my older and only boy is schizofrenic, paranoic and chronic depression, two weeks ago he decided for second times commit suicide. Everything in less than a month bad things happening to me. Imagine how i am feeling now? So move on with your life honey, try to do the best you can and try to date another person that love you the way you are inside, no outside.
I am going to register for get a new soul male for me, God love us and he has a good man for us. There are many survivors on this and other forums who are alone, and possibly unaware that another survivor with similar issues is out there, and maybe in close enough proximity to even meet and develop a relationship. This site is a likely place for such a forum. How 'bout it Jose, Dana, Et-Al.. I've had a hard time dating and holding relationships with non survivors.
The one relationship I had with a transplant survivor was great not cancer, but I had a stem cell trans but didn't work out, long story. I personally don't like talking about myself too much cause it brings back unpleasant memories,,, so I never asked my friend more than she was willing to talk about,,,.
I think making a site for "survivors" is so isolating, though. I don't know, so far I've been one of few, but I dislike the term survivor, NED or whatever terminology is used to indicate. I suppose in my mind, I'd much rather be seen as merely a person amongst everyone else than be singled out. Also, I really don't think I'd want to date another cancer survivor, either.
That isn't to say I'd completely rule it out, life happens, but.. I don't know. Just doesn't sound like something I'd go for, personally. I'd rather join a regular dating site, if need be. In terms of only looking to date people that are cancer survivors, I think it would not be a useful idea. While it certainly is true that people see life differently after having had cancer, people also see life differently after someone in their family having cancer, a traumatic accident, etc.
And even if someone did have cancer, he or she may not have the same experience from it as another person. I think one should be open to dating both cancer survivors and non cancer survivors. That being said, I do recognize that another cancer survivor may be easier to relate to, but worry that only looking for a relationship among cancer survivors would reduce one's chances of finding someone by too much.
The content on this site is for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Do not use this information to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease without consulting with a qualified healthcare provider. Please consult your healthcare provider with any questions or concerns you may have regarding your condition.
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Most sex therapists recommend using medical terms. It is best to avoid slang or euphemisms. Keep in mind that sexual intimacy involves more than intercourse. Experiment with other ways of giving and receiving sexual pleasure. Talking with a counselor or sex therapist. These professionals help address problems with communication and intimacy. Joining a support group.
These forums provide a safe place to share and learn from others with similar situations. Online Communities for Support. Dating and Intimacy Approved by the Cancer. Tips for pursuing new relationships Concerns about dating and sexual intimacy after cancer treatment are common.
Consider these strategies when developing new relationships: Practice positive self-talk. For example, make a list of your positive qualities. Tell friends and family you are ready to meet potential dating partners. Try a new activity, join a club, or take a class.
Talk with other cancer survivors who have started dating. Practice a response to rejection, if that possibility concerns you. How to share your cancer experience Before sharing, consider how you would feel most comfortable doing it. Potential issues to address Consider discussing these topics: The possibility of recurrence Physical limitations because of cancer or its treatment Your feelings about dating or starting a relationship Other types of preparation before sharing These steps may help you feel more confident entering the conversation: Write down what you plan to say.
Practice with a friend. Prepare responses to possible questions. Concerns about sexual health and intimacy As a relationship deepens, you may wonder how your experience with cancer could affect your sexual health and intimacy with your partner. Communication about sexual health and intimacy Communication is important for healthy sexual feelings in any relationship. If you are hesitant talking about your sexual health, consider these approaches: Decide what you want to say in advance.
Write down your thoughts, or share them with a friend. Pick a low-stress, unrushed time to talk. Find a private and neutral place for the discussion. Have multiple shorter conversations, if that feels more comfortable. Be honest about potential problems.